Johnny Durham » Blog Archive

Something happened a couple of weeks ago which made me feel pretty terrible. I was walking down the street with Conor, and there was a pigeon walking just infront of me. I sort of shooed the pigeon away with my foot as I kept walking. As I did that, the pigeon flew up out of my way, and headed across the road which was next to us… at that very same time a double decker bus was driving along the road, and the pigeon flew straight into it :(

I heard a massive thud as the pigeon hit the front of the bus. I didn’t see what happened to the pigeon, but I doubt it would have survived being hit by a huge bus.

If only I’d not been walking along the path at that exact time, or if only I’d made more of an effort to walk around the pigeon instead of shooing it out of the way… the pigeon would still be alive :(

It made me feel awful.

It’s strange though. Life and death is happening around us ALL the time. In the time I’ve been writing this blog post, hundreds of babies around the world will have been born. Hundreds of people will have died. Hundreds of flies will have been splattered on car windscreens, and hundreds of eggs will have been laid by hens.

It’s impossible to feel sad for all the terrible things that are happening in the world, and it’s impossible to feel happy for all the wonderful things that are happening. What makes us decide which things are worth feeling bad about, and which things aren’t?

And it just makes you think… like… what is the significance of it all? Why does any of it even matter?

I don’t know. I guess that’s one of life’s great unanswerable questions… or something.

Sorry for posting such a philosophical entry… but what else is there to do on a Sunday afternoon other than to philosophise?! :P

Much love,

Johnny <3

My best friends dad died less than 3 months ago, from a sudden heart attack. I’m still seeing the effects of it and i will for quite a while. It’s really awful :(
We had a really big heart to heart last night. lots of tears were shed

anyway :) have a good sunday :P

Kevin <3

http://www.twitter.com/griffybabyyyy

I hear what you’re saying. People don’t seem to realise that we’re small in comparison to the larger scheme of the earth. However I also believe everything happens for a reason and it might not of been entirely you that decided that pigeon’s fate.

Mitchh

Here’s another reason not to feel bad; you can’t know what would have happened if you took a different course. If you hadn’t brutally murdered that pigeon (lolz) some kid may have seen it and run after it, then it flies off as they do, over the road, kid follows, KID GETS HIT BY THE BUS! :O
So there’s no point feeling bad unless you intend to make bad things happen, which in your pigeon story you OBVIOUSLY DID YOU BASTARD.

However, I don’t agree with that guy ^ who said everything happens for a reason. I think we live in absolute chaos. (But I like it that way.)

So, this definately reminds me of when i was in 5th grade, so, around 10.
STORY TIME:
at the end of 5th grade, we all had a field day and all the teachers walked us down to the town common, and we played frisbee and football and just hung around and had picnics, it was wonderful.
But…right when we arrived, a nest full of baby robins fell out of a tree and the babies were sprinkled all over the ground. A few of my friends and I frantically tried to gather them up and put them under a bush or something for protection from the menacing bouncing footballs and feet all around. We managed to find a few, but we kept hearing them cheeping all around us.

Looking some more, I saw one bird bounce near the street, so i went after it. I hopped into the street, and i was about to step and reach out to grab it, but a teacher saw me and said not to go in the street, and took me by the arm and brought me back. As i turned to look for the bird over my shoulder, my eyes found the bird just in time to see it be crushed under the huge wheel of a truck. It was absolutely horrible…me and my friends just sat and cried for a while. And naturally my 10 year old self thought it was my fault, because I was just one step away from saving it. :(

But, soon enough, we decided we needed to save the rest of them even more now, and we scooted all the babies left back to the tree where their mom was frantically tweeting. They were all under a bush, and we turned away to let the mom handle the rest, when one baby hopped out from the bush. We all jumped to go help it again, still sad from the first bird, but miraculously, this little one didnt need it.
We watched him put his tiny bird feet on the bark of the tree, and somehow manage to climb his way ALL the way back up! It was insane!
We named him Indiana Jones…

So….i guess i was going to have a moral to the story, but i cant really think of one, other than i felt alot better about the first bird once i saw the miracle of the other bird. I suppose that the moral could be something like… you can’t always do the right thing, but when you can, it makes it more worth while. :)

i hope that helped a bit Johnny,
God Bless!
-Mik

^^ sorry for longest comment ever :P

Oh, also, i just found THE CUTEST little robot flashgame.
you have to save all the robots, its adorable.
http://www.bubblebox.com/play/adventure/1411.htm

the animation is great too

It doesn’t matter, simple.
I don’t see any significance in anything at the moment. Everything’s completely and utterly pointless.

That’s so sad and totally understandably that you feel bad about it. I’d be heartbroken too. Some people think it’s silly getting upset over something as “silly” as a small animal but it still hurts me. I guess we can just take comfort in knowing that our hearts are in the right place and that the world would be worse if each individual didn’t try to be a good person. Sometimes the world can shine so brightly and other times it can be so shitty.
Sorry you’re feeling blue :(
*Big hug*

Of course there are other things to do on a sunday afternoon… like playing children’s card games… yeah that was lame…. but i just saw the new terminator movie so tonight has been full of lame… :/ lol.

I think the point of life is to just simply live. To figure out what matters most to you and to go after them with everything you have. You can’t control the world around you…but you get to decide what matters to you. It’s beautiful…life..if you use it up. I think that’s one of the reasons I like reading your blog and such. I mean you care so much about being a vegetarian and your t-shirt business…it’s great!

I understand exactly how you feel, and i guess it’s hard not to feel responsible. I won’t say everything happens for a reason, as some things do, but somethings.. things just happen. There is no explanation. Life constantly flows around us, every single moment is new and most of our entire lives are just memories. And even if over half the time we wonder about what the point is.. what it all means.. the few times where everything fits perfectly, those ones where you’re with the person you love, you’re in some extraordinary place, those moments.. they make it worthwhile. And maybe thats what the point is. That even if you go days feeling horrible, the couple perfect moments you get throughout, are even more amazing because they mean something.
Alot of people would not have given it a second thought, because “it’s just a bird”. But theres nothing that gives that birds life any less meaning than any of ours. I don’t know if thats the way you look at it, but you caring.. it shows your compassion either way and thats a huge reason for why I love reading your blog. You seem like an amazing person, and it’s lovely to find people like you.
If none of this makes any sense, I’m very sorry!

Have a lovely day or night. <3

but what else is there to do on a Sunday afternoon other than to philosophise?! :P
sleep.
that’s what i did. =) i got home from work early and i took a nice 3 hr nap.

I love this blog post! It’s such a good point. I think that kind of determines what kind of person you are, glass half full or half empty. Would you rather be happy for the good things or sad for the bad? It kind of depends on which events directly affect you. It seems a bit selfish, but if you didn’t think about the things in your own life, nobody else would!

I love the way you think Johnny, I always find myself puzzling about life little mysteries as I am on the bus on my way to Uni. It’s nice to know some one thinks the same way as me and I am not just going mad!

Awww I love this entry! I think it’s really sweet. A lot of American guys can’t show this side of them =(

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